33.

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for my first feminine experience and always pushed it once the ice had been broken. There was, and still is, a very firm friead- ship between us as boy and girl. Her part in that friendship has always been delightful. Between us as girls, another side of her nature became apparent. She occupied the role of fond older sis- ter--solicitous and protective--yet at the same time she made sure that I played my feminine role to it's utmost. She constantly thrust me into positions that made me use every feminine wile but at the same time always stood ready to rescue me should I slip She jealously guarded my secret, even more aware than I of the consequences of detection. I suppose it is best explained as a matter of pride--she was, in effect, responsible for my being, and having created me it was her job to see that I did her credit. As Patsy left that afternoon Mother handed her the box of clothes, but she wouldn't take it, explaining that her Mother wanted to see me wearing them and we should keep them till she could come over. A few days later Patsy rushed in breathlessly to announce that her Mother was coming over in a few minutes to see me. Her excitement communicated itself to Mother and with no opportunity even to go on record as objecting, I was hustled into Patsy's clothes. But I remember what great pains Mother took to make sure I looked as nice as possible. Pride I guess.

We waited about an hour for Mrs. E---to arrive and when she did I was as tense as could be, but needlessly so. I think Mrs E--- instantly sensed my feelings ao she greeted me as always I didn t even detect a curious glance. Fortunately Mother and Patsy followed her example. We had a pleasant family visit for about an hour and as my tenseness wore off I began to move about and act naturally. When Mrs. E--- left she told Mother that she hadn't believed Patsy's statements that I looked just like a girl but for once Patsy hadn't exaggerated a bit. She said that I was amazingly and attractively feminine--better by far than her own daughter and she pointed out what I already knew that the dress was too childish for me. Then she said she would look through Patsy's things with some thing older in mind and would bring it over for me to try.

Three times within the next week Mrs. E--- either brought or sent clothes for me to try. At the same time she refused to